Wisdom

Wisdom

by | Jul 4, 2021 | Virtues

Description

Wisdom is the guardian of our choices. It helps us to discern the right path at the right moment. It gives us clarity of thought and deeper understanding. We use our best judgment, resisting the pull of impulse and desire. Wisdom gives us the maturity and patience to make sustainable decisions. We seek knowledge, enter reflection and open ourselves to inspiration. We consider carefully, then act confidently. Wisdom takes us beyond thought to a deeper knowing. Wisdom grounds us in grace.

Quote

“I, Wisdom, am mistress of discretion, the inventor of lucidity of thought. Good advice and sound judgment belongs to me, perception….strength…”

— Proverbs 8:12-14

 The Practice of Wisdom

  • I make discerning choices.
  • I resist destracting impulses.
  • I listen to my better judgment.
  • I reflect before I act.
  • I seek spiritual guidance.
  • I trust my deepest truth.
Definitions and practices of virtue are used with permission from the Virtues Project™.

In Family Life

The virtue of Wisdom in a family manifests as a collective ability to make thoughtful and informed decisions while nurturing open communication and understanding among its members. It’s demonstrated through the family’s capacity to consider the long-term consequences of their actions, prioritize harmony over fleeting disagreements, and seek solutions that benefit everyone involved.

Wise families encourage active listening, value diverse perspectives, and create an environment where each member’s experiences and insights are respected. This virtue is reflected in their choices as they navigate challenges with patience and discernment, fostering an atmosphere of mutual growth, shared learning, and unconditional support.

Balancing Wisdom

Several virtues can be our allies to maintain a balanced approach to wisdom.

      • Courage: Courage complements wisdom by encouraging us to act when necessary, even in uncertainty. Courage allows us to take calculated risks and move forward with conviction, bridging the gap between wisdom and action.
      • Humility: Humility helps keep wisdom in check. By acknowledging that we do not have all the answers and that our judgments may not always be infallible, humility encourages us to seek input from others and remain open to different perspectives. This ensures that our wisdom is not tainted by arrogance or a closed mind.
      • Compassion: Compassion reminds us to consider the well-being of others in our decisions, preventing wisdom from becoming self-serving or callous. Compassion reminds us that the true power of wisdom lies in its ability to benefit ourselves and those around us.

These virtues allow us to navigate life’s complexities with grace and integrity. In doing so, we unlock the full potential of wisdom as a guiding force that enriches our lives and those of others.

Wisdom

Unity

by | Jul 4, 2021 | Virtues

Description

Unity is a powerful virtue and it brings great strength. Unity is inclusiveness. It brings people together. We see our commonality without devaluing our differences. We experience our connectedness with all people and all life. Unity frees us from the divisiveness of prejudice and heals our fears. We refuse to engage in conflict, seeking peace in all circumstances. Unity comes when we value every person in our family or in our world. The joy of one is the joy of all. The hurt of one is the hurt of all. The honor of one is the honor of all.

Quote

“We know that we are the ones who are divided and we are the ones who must come back together to walk in the Sacred Way.”

— Ojibway Prayer, One World Book of Prayer, P. 152

 The Practice of Unity

  • I am a lover of humanity.
  • I seek common ground.
  • I appreciate differences.
  • I resolve conflict peacefully.
  • I honor the value of each individual.
  • I am a unifier.
Definitions and practices of virtue are used with permission from the Virtues Project™.

In Family Life

Unity within a family is exemplified by a seamless cohesion of members forged through mutual respect, open communication, and shared goals. It manifests in the willingness to support each other’s endeavors, celebrate achievements, and weather challenges as a united front.

This unity is demonstrated in the genuine concern for one another’s well-being, the ability to resolve conflicts constructively, and the cultivation of a nurturing environment where each member’s uniqueness is embraced while fostering a sense of belonging to a larger whole.

Ultimately, the virtue of Unity in a family is about fostering an unbreakable bond that stands firm in the face of adversity and collectively celebrates life’s joys.

Balancing Unity

To keep the virtue of Unity in balance, several other virtues can come into play:

      • Wisdom: Wisdom allows us to discern when to prioritize unity and when to stand up for what is right. It helps us make informed decisions that benefit the greater good while respecting individual rights and differences.
      • Courage: Courage is crucial in ensuring that Unity is not overdeveloped. It empowers individuals to speak out against injustice and advocate for change, even if it means challenging the status quo.
      • Empathy: Empathy helps us connect with others on a deep emotional level, fostering a genuine sense of unity. It allows us to understand and appreciate different perspectives, reducing the risk of prejudice and division.
      • Justice: Justice ensures that Unity is not underdeveloped by promoting fairness and equality. It helps address grievances and create a more inclusive and harmonious society.
      • Compassion: Compassion encourages us to care for the well-being of others and work towards collective happiness. It reinforces the idea that the joy, hurt, and honor of one should matter to all.

When these virtues work in harmony, we can achieve a unity that is both inclusive and just, bringing strength and healing to our communities and the world at large.

 

Wisdom

Understanding

by | Jul 4, 2021 | Virtues

Description

Understanding is the virtue that invites us to truly perceive both ideas and emotions with clarity and depth. It calls us to go beyond surface-level judgments, seeking the full truth in every situation. When we practice understanding, we are present with compassion, truly listening to others and embracing their perspectives. This mindfulness helps us discern what matters most, allowing us to be patient and empathetic as we seek to comprehend the nuances of any given moment.

Understanding requires us to step into another person’s shoes, let go of our assumptions, and strive to forgive with a heart open to seeing the whole picture. We value knowledge and use our minds to explore reality, allowing us to make wise decisions and support others in their personal growth. This virtue helps build stronger connections and nurtures peace as we appreciate the diversity of thoughts, feelings, and experiences that shape our world. Through understanding, we gain insight and foster a deeper connection with others and the world we share.

Affirmations for Understanding

1. I choose to listen fully before forming my opinion.
This encourages active listening, helping to understand others’ perspectives without rushing to judgment.

2. I seek to see the world through another’s eyes.
This practice fosters empathy and helps you step into another person’s shoes, enhancing your ability to connect with their emotions and experiences.

3. I remain open to new ideas and perspectives.
Keeping an open mind allows you to consider viewpoints different from your own, expanding your understanding of the world.

4. I acknowledge that I do not know everything.
Humility creates space for learning, enabling a deeper understanding by admitting our limitations.

5. I choose to ask questions when I don’t understand.
Seeking clarification ensures that you are not making assumptions and helps uncover the full truth in conversations.

strive to forgive others, knowing that understanding leads to peace 6. I will approach others with compassion, not judgment.
This encourages kindness and patience, creating an environment where understanding can flourish naturally.

7. I take time to reflect on what others are communicating.
Pausing for reflection allows for deeper processing of what someone is saying, improving your comprehension and response.

8. I recognize that everyone has their own journey and struggles.
This affirms your acceptance of each person’s unique experiences, helping you understand them without imposing your own perspective.

9. I embrace change as a natural part of life.
Forgiveness becomes easier when you understand the reasons behind someone’s actions, allowing for reconciliation and harmony.

10. I am patient with myself and others in the process of learning.
Patience allows for grace and understanding in relationships, giving everyone the space to grow and improve over time.

Quotes

“O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be understood as to understand.” — St. Francis of Assisi

“Everything that I understand, I understand only because I love.” — Leo Tolstoy

“Listen with ears of tolerance! See through the eyes of compassion! Speak with the language of love!” — Rumi

Understanding In Family Life

Understanding is the foundation for strong, harmonious relationships between parents and children in family life. It involves listening deeply to one another, not just to the words being spoken but to the feelings and needs behind those words. When parents practice understanding, they show patience and empathy, seeking to truly grasp their child’s thoughts, emotions, and experiences without jumping to conclusions or judgments. This helps children feel seen, valued, and respected, fostering a safe environment for open communication.

For children, understanding means learning to recognize that others have different perspectives, needs, and feelings. It encourages them to practice empathy by considering how their actions might affect their siblings or parents. In a family, when each member strives to understand the other, conflicts are reduced, and cooperation grows. It nurtures a sense of trust and compassion, where everyone feels heard and supported.

Understanding family life requires parents and children to be present, patient, and willing to embrace each other’s uniqueness. It builds an atmosphere where love and respect thrive and where challenges are met with grace and mutual support. Through understanding, families create deeper connections, resolving differences with kindness and growing stronger together.

Balancing Understanding

Understanding is a powerful virtue that fosters empathy, patience, and connection in relationships. However, when underdeveloped, it may lead to misunderstandings, impatience, or a lack of communication. On the other hand, if overdeveloped, it could result in losing personal boundaries or becoming overly accommodating. To keep understanding balanced, the following virtues provide essential support:

      • Discernment
        Discernment helps us wisely evaluate situations, ensuring that our understanding leads to sound judgments without being clouded by excessive empathy.

      • Assertiveness
        Assertiveness ensures that while we strive to understand others, we also express our own needs and boundaries clearly, preventing misunderstanding from compromising our well-being.

      • Compassion
        Compassion deepens our understanding by helping us care for others, but also reminds us to be gentle with ourselves when extending understanding becomes emotionally taxing.

      • Clarity
        Clarity ensures that our understanding is based on accurate communication and not assumptions, helping us articulate our thoughts with precision.

      • Patience
        Patience helps us take the time needed to fully comprehend another’s perspective, preventing frustration when immediate understanding is not reached.

      • Self-Respect
        Self-respect balances understanding by reminding us that while it’s important to understand others, we must also honor our own values and experiences.

      • Forgiveness
        Forgiveness helps release any grudges when misunderstandings occur, allowing understanding to be restored and relationships to heal.

      • Humility
        Humility allows us to recognize that we don’t have all the answers, staying open to learning and growing in our understanding of others.

      • Resilience
        Resilience helps us maintain understanding even in difficult circumstances, ensuring we remain steady and strong without becoming overwhelmed.

      • Wisdom
        Wisdom provides the insight needed to know when to offer understanding and when to step back, helping us maintain healthy relationships without overextending.

Understanding is a virtue that can be both empowering and transformative when balanced with these supporting virtues. By developing discernment, assertiveness, compassion, and others, we ensure that our understanding remains clear, healthy, and nurturing to ourselves and those around us. These virtues work together to create a well-rounded approach to fostering deeper, more meaningful connections.

 

Joe is a husband, father, grandfather, author, speaker, educator, course creator, and parent/family coach.

He helps parents develop unity, find clarity, communicate, and develop consistency in their parenting with the Four C’s of Successful Families. You can find his work on social media.

In addition, the Four C’s newsletter is enjoyed by many as it encourages parents to self-care, build their relationships with their partners, and raise their children. 

And he loves to golf! 

Joseph Michael
Wisdom

Truthfulness

by | Jul 4, 2021 | Virtues

Description

Truthfulness is the bedrock of integrity on which we build all our other virtues. It is an ongoing commitment to live by what is real, authentic and true for us. We make realistic decisions. We do not lie, cheat, or deceive. We tell the truth kindly. Our words and actions are trustworthy. Our promise is our bond. We do not allow others to have undue influence on our perceptions. We investigate the truth with our own eyes. Truth tells us that we aren not here to live another’s dream or to be all things to all people. We live our own true nature.

Quote

“Truthfulness is the foundation of all the virtues…When this holy attribute is established in man, all the divine qualities will also become realized.”

— Abdu’l-Baha

 The Practice of Truthfulness

  • I speak only the truth.
  • I have no need to impress or deceive others.
  • I use discernment to make good decisions.
  • I tell the truth with kindness and tact.
  • I investigate the truth for myself.
  • I know I am enough.
Definitions and practices of virtue are used with permission from the Virtues Project™.

In the Family

In a family, the virtue of truthfulness takes the form of a steadfast commitment to authenticity and integrity. It means family members make decisions rooted in reality, refraining from lies, deceit, or dishonesty. Truthfulness is demonstrated through honest and kind communication, where words and actions are reliable and promises are kept. In this family, the influence of others doesn’t overshadow individual perceptions, and the pursuit of truth is a collective endeavor.

Each member is encouraged to live according to their true nature, fostering an environment where genuine selves are embraced and celebrated. It is a family where trust is built upon the unwavering dedication to living by what is real, authentic, and valid for each member, strengthening the bonds of love and respect.

Balancing Truthfulness

Balanced Truthfulness is a guiding light in our pursuit of living authentically and honestly. Here are some balancing virtues.

      • Compassion: This virtue tempers the harshness of unbridled truthfulness by reminding us to consider others’ emotions and feelings. It encourages us to speak the truth kindly and empathetically, fostering healthier relationships.
      • Tact: Tact helps us convey the truth effectively and constructively. It empowers us to find courteous ways to express our thoughts and concerns, facilitating better communication and understanding.
      • Integrity: Integrity protects against underdeveloped truthfulness, reminding us to stay true to our values and principles, even when facing difficult choices or challenges.
      • Honesty: Honesty reinforces our commitment to truthfulness, encouraging us to confront situations with candor and transparency, ultimately building trust and authenticity in our interactions.

Balanced truthfulness is this delicate equilibrium in which truthfulness’s true power shines, nurturing our inner integrity and outer relationships.

 

Wisdom

Trustworthiness

by | Jul 4, 2021 | Virtues

Description

Trustworthiness is being worthy of the trust others place in us. When we give our word, we stand by it. Others can rely on us with confidence. We demonstrate by our actions that we keep our promises and commitments. There is constancy in the way we love and loyalty in the bonds of our friendships. Trustworthiness is the foundation of our business agreements and out personal covenants. When we ar worthy of trust, we attract abundance. We create lasting success.

Quote

“To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.”

— George MacDonald

 The Practice of Trustworthiness

  • I am reliable.
  • My actions match my words.
  • I only make promises I can keep.
  • I am faithful in love and friendships.
  • I treat my agreements as a sacred trust.
  • I attract prosperity by being worthy of trust.

Definitions and practices of virtue are used with permission from the Virtues Project™.

In Family Life

In family life, trustworthiness is a cornerstone virtue that fosters a nurturing and secure environment. This virtue is exemplified through consistently displaying honesty, reliability, and integrity within familial relationships.

As pillars of guidance, parents can demonstrate trustworthiness by consistently and openly communicating with transparency, ensuring promises are kept, and maintaining a steadfast commitment to their words and actions.

Moreover, upholding consistency in establishing and enforcing rules, routines, and disciplinary measures reinforces the value of trust. It provides children with a sense of stability and predictability, allowing them to rely on their parents as reliable sources of guidance and support.

By cultivating an atmosphere of trust through unwavering consistency, parents lay the foundation for their children’s emotional well-being, enabling them to confide, learn, and grow within a safe haven built upon the essential values of trust and reliability.

Balancing Trustworthiness

To maintain a balanced level of trustworthiness, several virtues come into play:

      • Honesty: Being honest and transparent is essential in striking a balance. Honesty ensures that one’s trustworthiness is grounded in authenticity and integrity.
      • Flexibility: While keeping commitments is important, being adaptable and open to change when necessary prevents the rigidity that can come with overdeveloped trustworthiness.
      • Self-Care: Prioritizing one’s well-being and setting healthy boundaries ensures that trustworthiness doesn’t lead to excessive self-sacrifice or burnout.
      • Judgment: The ability to discern when a promise should be kept and when it should be reconsidered is crucial. Judgment helps avoid the blind pursuit of trustworthiness at all costs.
      • Empathy: Understanding the impact of one’s actions on others is vital. Empathy enables individuals to balance their trustworthiness with compassion and consideration for others’ needs and feelings.

Trustworthiness is a virtue to be cherished, but like any virtue, it should be cultivated in balance. It can lead to unintended consequences when taken to extremes in either direction. By incorporating virtues like honesty, flexibility, self-care, judgment, and empathy, we can ensure that our trustworthiness remains a solid foundation for success and positive relationships.