Self-care: Getting Outside

Self-care: Getting Outside

by | Jul 24, 2024 | Self-care

July Self-Care Focus: Getting Outside

During this month, we have focused on the incredible benefits of getting outside and enjoying nature as a critical aspect of self-care. Let’s explore how moderation can help us strike the perfect balance in our self-care practices and bring more harmony and joy into our lives.

Understanding Moderation in Self-Care

Moderation is all about finding that sweet spot between too much and too little. It’s about using self-discipline to create a healthy balance between work, rest, reflection, and play. Regarding self-care, moderation ensures that we take care of ourselves without overindulging or neglecting our needs. It’s the practice of doing just enough to feel nourished and rejuvenated without tipping the scales too far in any direction.

The Healing Power of Nature

One of the most effective and enjoyable ways to practice self-care is spending time in nature. Whether it’s a walk in the park, a hike in the woods, or simply sitting in your backyard, nature has a unique way of restoring our energy and lifting our spirits. Here are some excellent benefits of getting outside:

1. Reduces Stress: Nature helps lower cortisol levels, reducing stress and promoting relaxation.

2. Boosts Mood: Sunlight and fresh air can significantly improve mood and mental health.

3. Enhances Physical Health: Outdoor activities like walking, hiking, and gardening provide excellent physical exercise.

4. Improves Focus: Time spent in nature can improve concentration and mental clarity.

Practicing Moderation in Outdoor Self-Care

While spending time outdoors is incredibly beneficial, it’s essential to approach it with moderation. Here’s how you can integrate this virtue into your nature based self-care routine:

1. Set Realistic Goals: Don’t feel pressured to spend hours outside daily. Start with small, manageable goals, such as a 20-minute walk or a quick visit to a local park.

   Example: Instead of committing to a daily hour-long hike, aim for three 30-minute weekly walks.

2. Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to how your body feels. If you’re tired or overwhelmed, taking a break is okay. Moderation means knowing when to push forward and when to rest.

   Example: If you planned a long hike but woke up exhausted, opt for a gentle stroll instead.

3. Balance Activities: Mix your outdoor activities to keep things exciting and balanced. Combine activities like jogging or biking with more relaxing ones like picnicking or birdwatching.

   Example: Spend one day hiking and the next day enjoying a peaceful afternoon reading a book under a tree.

4. Involve the Family: Make outdoor self-care a family affair. This will ensure you spend quality time together and teach your children the importance of moderation and nature appreciation.

   Example: Plan a family picnic or a weekend camping trip where everyone can participate in active and relaxing outdoor activities.

5. Reflect on Your Experiences: Take a moment to reflect on how spending time in nature makes you feel. This mindfulness can help you appreciate the balance you’re creating and stay motivated.

   Example: Keep a nature journal where you jot down your thoughts and feelings after each outdoor activity.

Overcoming Common Roadblocks

Sometimes, practicing moderation can be challenging, especially with our busy lives. Here are some common roadblocks and how to overcome them:

1. Time Constraints: It can take a lot of work to find time for self-care amidst a busy schedule. Prioritize your activities and make small, intentional changes.

   Solution: Schedule short outdoor breaks into your day, such as a 10-minute walk during lunch or an evening stroll.

2. Weather Conditions: Bad weather can deter us from going outside. Be prepared with alternatives.

   Solution: Create a list of indoor activities that mimic the benefits of nature, such as indoor plants, nature-themed videos, or a covered porch.

3. Lack of Motivation: It’s easy to skip self-care when you’re not motivated. Find ways to make it enjoyable.

   Solution: Join a local hiking group or invite a friend to join you on your outdoor adventures. Social connections can boost motivation.

The Balancing Virtues

To keep moderation in self-care balanced, integrate these complementary virtues:

1. Discipline: Helps you stay committed to regular outdoor activities without overdoing it.

2. Flexibility: You can adapt your plans based on your needs and circumstances.

3. Gratitude: Fosters appreciation for the simple joys of nature and outdoor experiences.

4. Mindfulness: Enhances awareness of how outdoor activities impact your well-being.

Embracing moderation in self-care, primarily through spending time in nature, can profoundly benefit your overall well-being. Finding a balance that works for you ensures that self-care becomes a sustainable and enjoyable part of your routine. Remember, it’s not about how much time you spend outside but the quality of those moments and the balance they bring to your life. So, step outside, breathe in the fresh air, and let nature guide you to a more balanced, joyful, and fulfilling self-care journey. Here’s to finding your perfect rhythm and thriving in the beauty of moderation!

Joe is a husband, father, grandfather, author, speaker, educator, course creator, and parent/family coach.

He helps parents develop unity, find clarity, communicate, and develop consistency in their parenting with the Four C’s of Successful Families. You can find his work on social media.

In addition, the Four C’s newsletter is enjoyed by many as it encourages parents to self-care, build their relationships with their partners, and raise their children. 

And he loves to golf! 

Joseph Michael
Embracing Mercy and Gratitude: The Power of Self-Care

Embracing Mercy and Gratitude: The Power of Self-Care

by | Jun 4, 2024 | Self-care

As we embark on this journey of self-discovery and self-care, let’s take a moment to dive into the beautiful intersection of mercy, gratitude, and self-care.

Picture this: a cozy evening wrapped in a warm blanket, a cup of your favorite tea in hand, and a heart full of gratitude for the blessings in your life. This is the essence of self-care—a gentle reminder to nourish our minds, bodies, and souls with love and kindness.

The Essence of Mercy and Gratitude:

Mercy is like a gentle embrace, wrapping us in compassion and forgiveness for ourselves and others. It’s about offering grace beyond what is deserved and extending a helping hand to those in need, including ourselves. Gratitude, on the other hand, is the sweet melody of appreciation, reminding us to count our blessings and find joy in the simple moments of life. When we combine these two virtues, magic happens. We create a tender love and understanding space, where self-care thrives and flourishes.

Practicing Mercy and Gratitude in Self-Care:

So, how do we integrate mercy and gratitude into our self-care routines? Let’s explore some practical examples and suggestions:

Daily Gratitude Practice: Start or end your day with a gratitude journal, where you jot down three things you’re thankful for. It could be as simple as the sun’s warmth on your face or the laughter of your loved ones. Cultivating a mindset of gratitude shifts your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant in your life, fostering a sense of contentment and peace.

Self-Compassion Meditation: Set aside a few minutes each day for a self-compassion meditation. Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and repeat loving-kindness phrases to yourself, such as “May I be happy, may I be healthy, may I be at peace.” This practice cultivates a sense of mercy towards yourself, allowing you to let go of self-criticism and embrace self-love.

Nourishing Self-Care Rituals: Create a list of self-care activities that fill your cup and make your heart sing. It could be anything from taking a long bubble bath, going for a nature walk, or curling up with a good book. The key is to prioritize activities that bring you joy and rejuvenate your spirit, showing yourself the same tenderness and care you offer others.

Gratitude Walks: Stroll in nature and immerse yourself in the beauty surrounding you. Notice the colors of the leaves, birds chirping, and the gentle breeze on your skin. With each step, express gratitude for the abundance of blessings in your life, grounding yourself in the present moment and filling your heart with joy.

Acts of Kindness: Practice random acts of kindness towards yourself and others. Treat yourself to a delicious meal, write yourself a love letter, or surprise a friend with a heartfelt gesture. By spreading kindness and mercy, you create a ripple effect of love and positivity that uplifts yourself and those around you.

The Importance of Mercy, Gratitude, and Self-Care:

Mercy, gratitude, and self-care are not just fleeting moments of bliss but essential pillars of a fulfilling and meaningful life. When we prioritize self-care, we replenish our well of compassion and resilience, allowing us to show up fully for ourselves and others. When we infuse our self-care practices with mercy and gratitude, we create a sacred space of healing and transformation, where every breath is a gift, and every moment is infused with love.

As we embark on this journey of self-care, let us remember to embrace the virtues of mercy and gratitude with open arms. Let us extend compassion and forgiveness to ourselves, recognizing that we are worthy of love and kindness, just as we are. And let us cultivate a heart full of gratitude for the abundance of blessings surrounding us, finding joy in life’s simple pleasures. Together, let’s create a world where self-care is not just an indulgence but a sacred act of love and reverence for ourselves and each other. You deserve it, beautiful soul.

Joe is a husband, father, grandfather, author, speaker, educator, course creator, and parent/family coach.

He helps parents develop unity, find clarity, communicate, and develop consistency in their parenting with the Four C’s of Successful Families. You can find his work on social media.

In addition, the Four C’s newsletter is enjoyed by many as it encourages parents to self-care, build their relationships with their partners, and raise their children. 

And he loves to golf! 

Joseph Michael
Embracing Devotion: A Pathway to Fulfilling Parenthood

Embracing Devotion: A Pathway to Fulfilling Parenthood

by | Apr 12, 2024 | Parenting, Relationships, Self-care, Virtues

In the hustle and bustle of parenthood, amidst the whirlwind of diapers, school runs, and bedtime stories, it’s easy for parents to lose sight of themselves and their relationships. Yet, amidst the chaos, there lies a beacon of light – the virtue of devotion.

Devotion is not just a word; it’s a profound commitment to something we hold dear, a passionate focus on our life’s purpose. It’s about wholeheartedly serving endeavors we love, including our role as parents and partners. Today, I want to invite you on a journey to explore how embracing devotion can transform your experience of parenthood, guiding you toward a more fulfilling and balanced life.

A fundamental truth lies at the heart of devotion: to care deeply for others, we must first care for ourselves. Parenthood often demands selflessness, but neglecting our needs leads to burnout and resentment. Imagine a pyramid with self-care forming its sturdy base. Just as a strong foundation supports a towering structure, nurturing ourselves provides the strength and resilience needed to navigate the challenges of raising children.

So, what does self-care look like? It’s about carving out moments for yourself amidst the chaos, whether it’s a morning meditation, a leisurely walk, or indulging in a hobby. It’s permitting yourself to rest without guilt, knowing that by refilling your cup, you have more to give to those you love.

Next comes the cornerstone of any thriving family – the partner relationship. Devotion to your partner is not just a promise spoken on your wedding day; it’s a commitment renewed daily through acts of love and kindness. It’s easy to let romance fall by the wayside amid parenting duties, but investing in your relationship is crucial for creating a stable and supportive environment for your children.

Take a moment to reflect on your relationship. How can you show your partner love and appreciation amidst the chaos of daily life? Whether it’s a heartfelt compliment, a surprise date night, or simply holding hands as you navigate parenthood together, these small gestures of devotion can strengthen your bond and set a powerful example for your children.

Finally, let’s consider the essence of parenting—guiding our children with love and intention. Devotion to parenting means aligning our actions with our values and creating a nurturing environment where our children can thrive. It’s about setting boundaries with compassion, fostering open communication, and leading by example.

Parents face countless daily decisions—from discipline to education to screen time limits. By grounding ourselves in our values and staying true to our principles, we can navigate these choices with clarity and confidence, knowing that we are acting in the best interest of our children.

In closing, I want to leave you with this thought: devotion is not a burden to bear but a gift to embrace. By prioritizing self-care, nurturing your partner relationship, and aligning your parenting with your values, you enrich your life and lay the foundation for a thriving family.

So, let us embrace devotion wholeheartedly – as a guiding light on our journey through parenthood, illuminating the path toward love, fulfillment, and lasting happiness.

I invite you to sign up for our newsletter. It is a great way to get the Virtue of the Month and tips on relationships, parenting, and self-care. In addition, you’ll be the first to know about upcoming classes for successful families.

To sign up, visit the “Newsletter” section here on the website. Enter your email address, and you’ll receive our newsletter in your inbox on Wednesdays.  I appreciate your interest in bringing out the best in your children and yourself. We look forward to keeping you informed through our newsletter!

How Devotion Strengthens Boundaries for a Fulfilling Life

How Devotion Strengthens Boundaries for a Fulfilling Life

by | Apr 8, 2024 | Self-care

When properly cultivated, devotion can be pivotal in establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries. At its core, devotion entails a deep commitment to a cause, relationship, or practice. When applied to self-care and boundary-setting, devotion empowers individuals to prioritize their well-being while nurturing meaningful connections with others.

Losing Sight of Boundaries

Parents can blur the lines between their roles as caregivers and individuals, leading to boundary issues and resentment in relationships.

Here’s how the virtue of devotion can assist in setting healthy boundaries:

1. Clarity of Purpose: Devotion helps individuals clarify their values and priorities. By being devoted to self-care and well-being, one clearly understands what is truly important. This clarity enables them to recognize when boundaries need to be set to protect their mental, emotional, and physical health.

2. Assertiveness and Self-Advocacy: Devotion fosters a sense of self-worth and self-respect. Individuals become more assertive in expressing their needs and desires when devoted to themselves. They understand that setting boundaries is not selfish but necessary for maintaining their health and happiness.

3. Respect for Others: Setting boundaries is about protecting oneself and respecting others’ boundaries. Devotion encourages empathy and compassion, helping individuals understand and honor the boundaries of those around them. This mutual respect strengthens relationships and fosters healthier interactions.

4. Consistency and Discipline: Devotion requires consistency and discipline. Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries often requires ongoing effort and commitment. By cultivating the virtue of devotion, individuals develop the resilience and perseverance needed to uphold their boundaries even in challenging situations.

5. Emotional Regulation: Devotion promotes emotional awareness and regulation. It encourages individuals to tune into their feelings and respond to them constructively. When confronted with boundary violations, devoted individuals are more likely to address the situation calmly and assertively rather than reacting impulsively.

6. Personal Growth and Fulfillment: Devotion to self-care and boundary-setting ultimately contributes to personal growth and fulfillment. Honoring one’s needs and boundaries cultivates a stronger sense of self-awareness, self-compassion, and self-empowerment, which enables one to lead more authentic, balanced, and fulfilling lives.

Incorporating the virtue of devotion into one’s life can be a transformative journey toward establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries. It requires commitment, self-reflection, and ongoing practice, but the rewards for increased well-being and healthier relationships are immeasurable. Remember, you deserve to prioritize your well-being, and setting boundaries is essential to self-care and personal growth.

Joe is a husband, father, grandfather, author, speaker, educator, course creator, and parent/family coach.

He helps parents develop unity, find clarity, communicate, and develop consistency in their parenting with the Four C’s of Successful Families. You can find his work on social media.

In addition, the Four C’s newsletter is enjoyed by many as it encourages parents to self-care, build their relationships with their partners, and raise their children. 

And he loves to golf! 

Joseph Michael

6 Ways to Stop Your Negative Thinking

6 Ways to Stop Your Negative Thinking

by | Jan 3, 2024 | Self-care

 

Most people know that negative thinking isn’t doing them any favors on the happiness front. However, fewer people realize that the patterns of their thinking, when habitually negative, could make them sick.

In an article for UCL News, Dr. Natalie Marchant discusses her research on the link between cognitive decline and negative thinking. She reveals that depression, anxiety, and PTSD are all risk factors for developing dementia. Furthermore, she notes that common to each of these conditions is a pattern of engaging in “Repetitive Negative Thinking.”*

You are not your negative thoughts!

The mechanism by which negative thinking causes physical harm to the body is thought to be through inducing stress which raises blood pressure and cortisol levels, among other less understood impacts. Fortunately, there are ways to break out of patterns and create new, healthier ones. The following six methods are a good place to start.

 

1.      Tune in

The first step in making any change is identifying what isn’t working. Until you do that, it’s woefully difficult to know where to begin. It helps to start by creating a habit of reflecting on the nature of your self-talk—the dialogue in your head that narrates what you’re doing and often has a value judgment attached to it.

At first, just identify patterns, note them, and reflect on how they make you feel. The more persistent the thoughts are, the more attention they should receive. If they’re both frequent and leave you feeling rotten, you’ve just identified a weed that needs pulling.

Once you establish that fact, you can begin incorporating a replacement positive thought each time the negative one emerges. Make it incremental and realistic. You cannot jump from frustration to pure joy in one giant leap. For example, if you habitually think, “I’m such an idiot!” It might not work to replace that thought with, “I’m such a genius!”

Your mind may convert that to sarcasm, undermining your effort. Instead, try something like, “I’m a work in progress.”  This is a true statement of any of us and promotes efficacy.

 Take Care

A simple way to improve the nature of your thoughts is to be mindful of how you’re treating yourself. If you eat low-quality food, don’t exercise, and get lousy sleep, your body and mind will not function at their best. In addition, those behaviors send the subconscious message that you do not value yourself. That alone can be the wellspring of negative thinking.

So, eat a balanced diet of the freshest, highest quality food you can get, prioritize moving every day, and get serious about your sleep hygiene. Do those three things, and your thoughts naturally turn in the right direction.

2.     Prioritize Relationships

The Blue Zone studies, which track some of the healthiest and longest-lived people globally, revealed nine consistent behaviors. Of those nine, four of them are related to relationships. These are moderate consumption of wine with friends, a shared faith-based community, prioritizing family, and a consistent long-term friend group.**

There is abundant additional evidence to support the value of forming and sustaining healthy relationships, but the simplest way to recognize the value is to try it. Connecting with others is very likely how we evolved our big brains. The more love you share, the more love you feel, perpetuating good emotions and a long life.

3.      Foster Gratitude

When negative thoughts start pounding in your head, pause and redirect. Think of one to three things that you’re grateful for. It doesn’t have to be complicated or expansive, but it can be. You might start with being grateful that you woke up. From there, you had a bowel movement, that you could eat breakfast, that nobody is shooting at you, that someone loves you, etc.

The point is to start paying attention to things that are going right for you and acknowledging them. This creates a habit of seeing the good and can help crowd out the bad. In life, I have noticed that you get what you focus on.

4.      Be More Kind

This can begin with being nicer to yourself. However, it should extend to others as well. Few things get you out of your head faster than thinking about another being. Doing something thoughtful for someone is a way to promote surges of good chemicals (oxytocin, dopamine) and add value to your day.

Even little things—a call, a text, opening a door, rescuing a bird, watering a plant, asking an employee at your favorite grocery store about their day (and listening)—can all make a difference. The more you do it, the easier it becomes. Also, it has the added benefit of making other people nicer to you. Try it; you’ll see. Can you do three acts of kindness each day? Make one of them for yourself.

5.     Don’t Take Things For Granted

You might not realize it, but ruminating on the past and worrying about the future are ways of getting outside of where you are. The more time you spend outside of the moment, the more likely you are to ignore what actually matters and what needs your attention in the here and now.

Life is fleeting, and we’re only here for a flash. Impermanence is something that we’d do our best not to forget. It’s not about morbidly pondering death but rather embracing each moment, living fully, and leaving nothing to regret. Live your life in the now and like you love to live, and it will love you back.

 

References:

I invite you to sign up for our newsletter. It is a great way to get the Virtue of the Month and tips on relationships, parenting, and self-care. In addition, you’ll be the first to know about upcoming classes for successful families.

To sign up, visit the “Newsletter” section here on the website. Enter your email address, and you’ll receive our newsletter in your inbox on Wednesdays.  I appreciate your interest in bringing out the best in your children and yourself. We look forward to keeping you informed through our newsletter!

Embrace the Power of Vision

Embrace the Power of Vision

by | Dec 27, 2023 | Self-care

As December unfolds its tranquil beauty, it invites us to step into the realm of possibility and dare to dream. The year may be drawing to a close, but another chapter of your life is about to begin. In this blog post, we will explore the transformative practice of envisioning the year ahead, setting inspiring yet achievable goals, and allowing your dreams to shape the path you wish to walk. So, let us embark on this uplifting journey of self-discovery and creation.

create a dream board

Dreaming Your Way to a Remarkable Year Ahead

Dreaming is not a frivolous pursuit; it is the wellspring of inspiration and the foundation of growth. Your dreams can breathe life into your aspirations and shape your future. When you dare to dream and plan, you open doors to new possibilities, harness your inner strength and set the stage for remarkable achievements.

Step 1: Find a Quiet Refuge

To begin this transformative process, find a quiet refuge where you can let your thoughts wander freely. Choose a place to connect with your innermost desires, whether it’s a cozy corner of your home, a serene park, or a hidden alcove in a bustling café.

Step 2: Reflect on the Past Year

Take a moment to reflect on the year that’s coming to an end. What were your highlights, accomplishments, and moments of growth? Acknowledge the challenges you faced and the valuable lessons you learned. This reflection will provide a springboard for envisioning your future.

Step 3: Give Yourself Permission to Dream

Allow yourself to dream without limitations or self-doubt. Close your eyes and envision the year ahead. What do you want to achieve? How do you want to feel? Let your imagination roam freely and explore the possibilities that excite your spirit.

Step 4: Set Inspiring, Realistic Goals

From your dreams, distill concrete and achievable goals. Make them inspiring yet grounded in reality. Use the SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) criteria as a guide. Your goals should resonate with your heart and align with your values.

Step 5: Create a Vision Board or Journal

Visual aids can be powerful tools for manifesting your dreams. Consider creating a vision board with images, quotes, and symbols representing your goals. Alternatively, maintain a journal where you jot down your dreams, goals, and the action steps required to achieve them.

Step 6: Break Goals into Actionable Steps

Break down your goals into actionable steps to turn your dreams into reality. What can you do today, this week, this month, and throughout the year to inch closer to your dreams? Create a timeline and prioritize these steps.

Step 7: Cultivate Resilience and Adaptability

Remember that the journey toward your dreams may not always be smooth. Challenges and unexpected detours may arise. Cultivate resilience and adaptability as your companions on this journey. Embrace setbacks as opportunities for growth and learning.

Step 8: Stay Connected to Your Vision

Lastly, stay connected to your vision throughout the year. Review your goals regularly, celebrate your progress, and make adjustments as needed. Share your dreams with supportive friends or mentors who can provide guidance and encouragement.

As you embark on this journey of dreaming and planning for the year ahead, may you be filled with hope, inspiration, and a deep sense of purpose. Your dreams guide you towards a life rich with meaning and fulfillment. Cherish them, nurture them, and let them illuminate your path.

May the coming year be a testament to your courage, resilience, and unwavering commitment to your dreams. With each step you take, you bring your vision closer to reality. Embrace this journey with an open heart, and may your year ahead be filled with joy, growth, and the realization of your deepest desires.

A Compassionate Self-Assessment for the Year’s End

This blog post will explore the significance of assessing your physical, emotional, and mental well-being and how you can gently and compassionately embark on this self-assessment journey.  Read here.

Coming This Month

Year-End Guide to Evaluating Your Relationships

In this blog post, we will delve into the art of evaluating your relationships with a heart full of encouragement and guidance, helping you make informed decisions on nurturing and cherishing these precious bonds. Read here.

create a dream board

Coming This Month

Setting the Stage for a Bright Future

In this blog post, we will delve into the art of reviewing your goals with a sense of encouragement and to help you make the most of this introspective process. Read here.

I invite you to sign up for our newsletter. It is a great way to get the Virtue of the Month and tips on relationships, parenting, and self-care. In addition, you’ll be the first to know about upcoming classes for successful families.

To sign up, visit the “Newsletter” section here on the website. Enter your email address, and you’ll receive our newsletter in your inbox on Wednesdays.  I appreciate your interest in bringing out the best in your children and yourself. We look forward to keeping you informed through our newsletter!