Get Dad to Pull His Weight Around the House

Get Dad to Pull His Weight Around the House

by | Jun 16, 2023 | Relationships, Self-care

In the epic saga of family life, where bills need paying, kids need nurturing, and homes need taming, it takes two mighty forces to create a harmonious and thriving household. We’re talking about you, the remarkable parents determined to bring out the best in yourselves and your exceptional children. It’s time to unleash the power of teamwork and witness the extraordinary results that await you!

Gone are the days when moms were expected to bear the weight of putting the kids to bed, cleaning the entire house, and playing the part of a domestic superhero while their partners watched from the sidelines. These days, we’re witnessing a new breed of dads who are just as passionate about sharing the load as you are! Or we should be!

But here’s the thing: Every superhero has unique powers and weaknesses. Just as no two heroes are the same, every man has his own quirks and preferences regarding household chores. So, it’s time to don your capes of understanding and embark on a mission to empower your partners in crime to become champions of the home!

1. Embrace the Diversity of Heroes: Remember, every man is different, just like every superhero has unique skills. Some dads may intentionally try to minimize their household workload, some may be oblivious, and others may take charge without being asked. Your husband likely falls somewhere within this spectrum.

It’s essential to recognize that there are better approaches than what worked for your sister and brother-in-law for your dynamic duo. Each superhero has its origin story, and understanding your partner’s strengths and weaknesses is critical to unlocking their potential.

2. The Art of Persuasion: Nobody likes being nagged, not even superheroes! So, let’s approach this challenge with finesse. Instead of launching into battle mode, try a tactful approach. Open the conversation by expressing your needs and concerns, highlighting their impact on your well-being. For instance, you might say, “Honey, my back feels on fire! The weekly vacuuming is taking a toll. Please take charge of this task and save my superhero spine.”

3. Charting the Course to Victory: Sometimes, our partners may need help to fully grasp the scope of tasks required to maintain a smoothly running household. However, even the mightiest of heroes can rise to the challenge with a little more perspective. Create a vibrant chore chart, a beacon of organization, and display it prominently in the kitchen—the heart of your superhero headquarters. Assign different-colored stars to each family member, distinguishing their responsibilities. Remember to include you and your heroic partner in the chart because teamwork makes the dream work!

4. The Power of Clarity: Superheroes thrive on precise instructions. Just as they need their mission objectives spelled out, providing clear guidance to our partners is crucial. What may seem like “helping out” to them might differ from our heroic visions? So, let’s communicate our expectations effectively. Instead of leaving room for misinterpretation, spell out the chores you need assistance with. From loading the dishwasher to folding laundry, let there be no doubt in the superhero manual!

5. When All Else Fails: Unleash the Ultimate Weapon! In rare cases where your partner remains resistant, it’s time to show them you mean business. Don’t worry; we won’t resort to kryptonite or gamma radiation. Instead, take the initiative to gather quotes from local cleaning services. Schedule a walkthrough of your home with a consultant, making sure your partner is present. When he realizes that picking up his slack could cost your family a mighty $400 per month, he will feel the tremors of responsibility and be more willing to lend a hand!

Remember, dear Super Parents, men, and women often have different perspectives on household chores. But fear not, for armed with these strategies, you are on the path to victory! When both heroes combine their powers, the household will run remarkably efficiently, and the symphony of laughter and joy will reverberate throughout your heroic abode!

So, stand tall, wear your capes with pride, and let the co-parenting adventure unfold. Together, you are an unstoppable force that will conquer any challenge, creating a legacy of love and inspiration for your extraordinary children.

Onward to greatness!

5 Steps to Talking About Emotions with Your Significant Other

5 Steps to Talking About Emotions with Your Significant Other

by | May 26, 2023 | Relationships, Self-care

Communication is Vital in Any Relationship

Communication is so vital in any relationship. In a romantic relationship, being able to communicate what you’re feeling is absolutely crucial. It is the bridge that binds two hearts together. Unfortunately, most of us could be better at expressing how we feel. Amidst the myriad of topics that we discuss with our significant other, the one that tends to be most elusive is emotions.

The depth of our feelings, the magnitude of our vulnerabilities, and the subtle shades of our mood often remain unvoiced or misunderstood, leading to unnecessary misunderstandings and conflict. Even saying “I love you” can feel complicated sometimes, even though you know you have strong feelings for the other person. The problem? Vulnerability is hard. When we’re open about how we’re feeling, we also open ourselves to the possibility of rejection. However, emotions form the core of our being and need to be discussed, acknowledged, and understood.

So, how can you learn to talk about your emotions with your significant other?

Start with Setting Time Aside to Talk 

We will talk about being prepared and knowing ourselves in a minute. Still, first, you want to avoid unexpectedly springing this kind of conversation on the other person. You’re more likely to have a more successful conversation if you plan ahead. Let the other person know you want to talk and follow through by setting aside time where no one will be distracted. Try to do this in a quiet place to gather your thoughts properly. Having some idea of what you want to say is always better than just ‘winging it.’ You don’t need to write a speech or even rehearse, though. Just having a clear idea in your mind about what you want to say is enough.

So, how can you learn to talk about your emotions with your significant other?

 Be Prepared

1. Cultivate Emotional Self-Awareness:

The first step to having a meaningful conversation about feelings is understanding your emotions. Emotional self-awareness refers to recognizing and understanding your own feelings. It’s about being aware of your feelings, why you feel that way, and how it can affect your behavior. Emotional self-awareness is a critical aspect of emotional intelligence and is the starting point for your emotional communication journey. It involves recognizing, understanding, and managing your own emotions. Here are some detailed steps to enhance your emotional self-awareness:

2. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is about staying present in the moment and observing your feelings and thoughts without judgment. It’s about detaching from your emotions to observe them as an outsider. Regular practice of mindfulness, which can be through meditation, yoga, or simple breathing exercises, can help you discern your emotional patterns, thereby improving your emotional self-awareness.

3. Keep an Emotion Journal:

 Writing about your emotions can be a cathartic process that helps you understand your feelings better. An emotion journal involves documenting your feelings and the circumstances that led to these feelings at different points of the day. Over time, this journal can help you identify patterns in your emotional responses and understand the triggers that lead to specific emotions.

4. Engage in Self-Reflection:

Take out time from your routine to reflect on your feelings. Ask yourself questions like, “What am I feeling right now?”, “Why am I feeling this way?” and “How am I reacting to these feelings?”. This process of self-reflection can bring clarity and deepen your understanding of your emotional landscape.

5. Practice Emotional Labeling:

Accurately labeling your emotions is a significant part of emotional self-awareness. Rather than using broad terms like happy, sad, angry, or stressed, try to use more specific words to describe your feelings, such as frustrated, content, anxious, or excited. This process, known as emotional granularity, can help you understand the nuances of your emotions better.

6. Seek Feedback from Others:

Sometimes, others can provide a perspective on our emotional responses that we may overlook. Seek feedback from people you trust and who know you well. Ask them about their observations of your emotional responses in various situations.

7. Seek Professional Help:

Sometimes, understanding your emotions can be challenging. In such cases, seeking help from a trained professional, such as a psychologist or a counselor, can be beneficial. These professionals can guide you through your emotional journey and provide tools and techniques to enhance your self-awareness.

Cultivating emotional self-awareness is a journey that requires patience and dedication. But practice can help you understand yourself better, improve your relationships, lead to personal growth, and help you express yourself accurately in your conversations.

Create a Safe Space

Once you have a grip on your feelings, it’s time to create an environment that fosters open and honest communication. A safe space is where you and your partner can share your feelings without fear of judgment or dismissal. This means actively listening, showing empathy, and providing reassurance that their feelings are valid and vital.

Creating a safe space involves:

  • Respecting each other’s emotional boundaries.
  • Offering reassurance.
  • Communicating with kindness and patience.

Building this environment may take time and effort, but it is essential for emotional conversations.

Talk About Yourself 

It’s best to focus on yourself whenever you’re conversing about what you’re feeling. When expressing emotions, it’s vital to frame your feelings as experiences rather than attributing them to your partner’s actions.

This is where ‘I’ statements come into play. They allow you to express your feelings without blaming or criticizing your partner.

Explain the emotions you’re experiencing without blaming or aggression. For example, use “I” statements such as “I have been feeling frustrated lately” over “You” statements like “Lately, you make me frustrated.”

Instead of saying, “You make me feel neglected,” try saying, “I feel neglected when I don’t hear from you all day.” This way, you focus on your emotions rather than accusing your partner. This can help prevent defensive reactions and promote understanding.

The framework for an I statement is straightforward. You can fill in these blanks: I feel ______ when _____.  Next time, I would like _________.

Detail Your Experience & show Empathy

Don’t just leave the conversation on what emotion you’re feeling. Instead, discuss what led to this emotion and what you would like. Again, be as specific as possible. Whether you brought the subject up or if you are hearing how your partner is responding, having a conversation is a two-way practice. Our listening skills and demonstration of empathy are critical to accomplishing the goal of understanding and meeting our needs.

The other person might be unhappy to hear what you have to say. Pay attention to their body language and express an understanding of what they’re feeling. Remember, this is supposed to be a conversation, so invite them to share their thoughts and feelings. Be sure to practice being a good listener while they’re doing the talking.

Practice Active Listening

Active listening is a crucial step in discussing emotions. It involves fully focusing, understanding, responding, and remembering what is said. This isn’t just about hearing the words but also about understanding the emotions behind them.

Resist the urge to interrupt, judge, or offer advice unless it’s asked for. Instead, offer acknowledgments and ask open-ended questions (What and How) to show your partner that you’re engaged and interested in understanding their feelings.

Remember, your role is to understand their emotions, not to fix them.

Create the Desired Outcome 

Why is it essential for the other person to know you feel this way? Are you explaining to clear the air? Are you hoping for support? Are you looking for your significant other to do something different in the future? If you’re unsure what you’d like to happen next, it’s okay to say this too. Then, you and your partner can brainstorm ideas regarding the next steps. The key here is to work together on these outcomes.

The best part about having these sorts of conversations is they open you to create a closer relationship with the one you love. Vulnerability is essential to intimacy and helps keep things from festering or creating a wedge between you. So, as you move forward with your significant other, have these conversations regularly.

Seek Professional Guidance if Needed

Sometimes, even with the best intentions and efforts, emotional conversations can become challenging or not lead to the desired understanding. This is when it may be helpful to seek professional help.

A licensed therapist or counselor can provide valuable tools and strategies for navigating emotional discussions and can also provide a neutral space for these conversations to take place.

Sharing emotions is a journey of vulnerability and courage, and it’s absolutely okay to ask for help along the way. Discussing feelings and emotions with your significant other is essential for a healthy, empathetic, and understanding relationship.

It may seem daunting but with self-awareness, a safe space, the use of ‘I’ statements, active listening, and sometimes professional guidance if needed, you can create an environment of open emotional dialogue with your partner. And remember, every conversation you have is a step towards stronger emotional intimacy and a deeper bond.

The Importance of Playing Outdoors with Your Children

The Importance of Playing Outdoors with Your Children

by | May 11, 2023 | Parenting, Self-care

There Are Benefits for Parents and Child

Computers and other gadgets have become pivotal in the lives of most people under 50. Technology is infused into your children’s everyday lives in ways most of us never imagined. Whatever happened to playing outside?

Most technology involves a lot of sitting still, which uses something other than our children’s natural abundance of energy.

 However, if you’ve ever tried to get your kids to unplug from these devices, you know what a chore that can be!

You’ve most likely set limits on how long your kids can fiddle with their gadgets. However, they’ll need help finding things to do when they can’t plug in. So why not play outside as a family?

Physical benefits of playing outdoors with children

There are physical and psychological benefits to getting the kids outdoors to play and for parents to join them.

The most obvious is that outdoor play increases physical activity, which helps children maintain a healthy weight, strengthen their bones and muscles, and reduce the risk of chronic diseases.

Even more than that, outdoor play allows children to develop their motor skills, including hand-eye coordination, balance, and agility.

Children can enhance their gross motor skills by running, jumping, and climbing, while smaller movements such as digging, building, or playing a sport can improve their fine motor skills.

Use activities like playing with balls and other equipment and encourage them to climb and find things they can balance to improve their strength and confidence. Join them in running, jumping, and hopping games. As they age, the family can ride bikes, ski, snowboard, go rafting, or do other physical activities.

Finally, playing outdoors provides children with exposure to nature and fresh air, which can enhance their respiratory and immune systems and improve their mood and overall well-being.

All of these are good for adult parents as well.

Psychological Benefits of Outdoor Play

In addition to physical benefits, playing outdoors also offers psychological benefits for children.

Unorganized outdoor play promotes increased creativity and imagination as children are encouraged to explore and discover new things in their environment.

Play is a child’s work.

Please enable opportunities for them to create new games, engage in role-playing, and engage in imaginative play, which can enhance their problem-solving and critical-thinking skills. As they grow, include gardening and yard responsibilities. This helps to get the whole family outside and appreciate the idea of teamwork as family work.

Organized play, like team sports, and additional activities like camping and hiking contribute to the development of character and a child’s mental health by helping to reduce stress and anxiety levels. In addition, being in nature and participating in physical activity has been shown to have a calming effect on the body and mind. 

Children walking with you or playing outside may be willing to talk more, and you will get a deeper insight into their thinking and personalities. In addition, when playing with other children outdoors, they will develop their social skills as they interact and communicate with their peers, negotiate and collaborate on games, and develop their emotional intelligence. These skills are essential for building healthy relationships and social connections throughout their lives.

A couple of notes: We all want our children to grow up safely and in good health. Sun protection, water safety, playground safety, and protection from some outdoor pests like ticks and other insects are part of a parent’s responsibility to their kids. In addition, teaching them about cooperative play will add to the safety of those times you are on the playground with others.

Concluding Thoughts

Outdoor activities provide a unique opportunity for parents to connect with their children in a different way than is possible indoors. Engaging in activities such as hiking, camping, or playing sports requires teamwork, communication, and trust, which can help strengthen the bond between parents and children

Outdoor activities also offer an escape from the stresses and distractions of daily life, allowing parents and children to focus on enjoying each other’s company and the beauty of nature.

In addition, playing outside together allows parents to be more involved in their children’s lives and interests. By participating in activities that their children enjoy, parents can show their support and interest in their children’s hobbies and passions, building a sense of trust and open communication between parents and children, as children feel heard and valued by their parents.

Outdoor activities also allow parents to model healthy behaviors and habits for their children. Parents can instill a love of nature and a commitment to staying active and healthy by engaging in physical activity and spending time outdoors with their children. This can help reinforce positive habits and values that can last a lifetime.

My youngest son was never interested in sports, going outside, or outdoor activities. Instead, he enjoyed reading, watching movies, creating movies, and writing stories. So I had to be accepting of that while at the same time offering opportunities and making time when we would be outside doing the simple things.

Today, some 30 years later, he is an avid runner, uses his bike to get to work 10 miles from his home, and enjoys the outdoors more than I ever saw him do when he was young. The lesson is that as parents, we need to do what is best for our children in a way that respects their likes and dislikes and does what is best for their health, success, and long-term happiness. So if you have a young child, start early. If they are older and are like my son, help them to step outside their comfort zone without disrespecting what they love. In the end, they will likely enjoy a variety of activities, both indoors and outdoors.

A Joseph Michael Personal Story

Ultimately, outdoor activities are powerful for building strong and healthy relationships between parents and children. By spending time together outside, parents can create shared experiences and memories that can last a lifetime and strengthen the bond between them and their children. Likewise, spending time with your children outside the house builds a strong and healthy relationship, fostering a sense of trust, respect, and love that can carry over into all aspects of family life.

Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth

Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth

by | May 5, 2023 | Parenting, Self-care, Virtues

Setting Your Life Priorities

Are the complexities and chaos of life leaving you confused at times and struggling to figure out the next step that is best for you and your family? Whether young or old, single or with a partner, setting priorities is crucial for living a fulfilling and purposeful life. It helps us align our actions with our values and goals.

When you were young and single, your priorities often involved personal growth, self-discovery, career building, or education. The activities we took part in may have had a goal that promoted physical, mental, and emotional well-being, such as exercise, travel, or pursuing hobbies. They may also have prioritized building skills, networking, or gaining experience in your field.

In contrast, parents’ priorities often revolve around their families’ well-being and their children’s growth and development. Family bonding, attending family events, children’s education, extracurricular activities, and emotional well-being are high on their list of priorities. Of course, your career and personal goals may loom large if you are a single parent. Still, generally, like all parents, you look at how your decisions contribute to your family’s overall well-being.

Either way, making those priority decisions is hard when everything feels necessary, and you struggle. On the parenting side, you may ask, “What activities will the children participate in?” What school will they attend? “Are the children on a developmental track?” Then the hard stuff begins. What are the house rules? How will I discipline and train my children? How are consequences determined and implemented? Mike Tyson once said, “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.” When you’re a parent, it feels like that sometimes. We all know how we planned on parenting, and then we get punched in the mouth.

Setting your life’s priorities, or, as we say in the Four C’s of Successful Families, clarity in life, is more than just what the kids’ extracurricular activities and schooling will be. More important is having a vision, identifying values, and even a mission for your family. Knowing what you want for yourself and your family is critical for every family. Decision-making comes more effortlessly with a clarification of family values. Finally, there is a peaceful feeling knowing that you are doing what is suitable and correct for you, helping you feel more fulfilled and satisfied with life experiences for you and your children.

Here are some common life priorities.

      • Family
      • Education
      • Finances
      • Friends,
      • Extended family
      • Work
      • Hobbies
      • Personal appearance
      • Health and exercise
      • Nutritious eating
      • Alone time or partner time
      • Quality time with children

How you choose your priorities depends wholly on what you value. The virtues are the foundation of those values. Recognizing, identifying, and clarifying these virtues and values may take time and effort. However, once these are clear to you, your priorities, choices, and decisions in every part of your life will be much easier.

Before you begin this exercise, please be aware that there is a danger that you must be careful about. The risk with this exercise is that sometimes our answers get tainted by social norms or the ideas others place before us. Even our long-held beliefs can influence how we think we feel and not align with our true selves. So as you answer these questions and identify your values and priorities, take your time to reflect, examine, and be confident that those influences are not diminishing your beliefs and desires.

Here is a first step:

Choose one role: parent, employee, volunteer, student, etc. You can do this with all of your roles, but for now, choose one that is high on your list of priorities.

      • Write a brief description of your best self in this role.
      • Describe how you want to be in this role.
      • How do you want to be remembered by others?
      • What is the legacy you would like to leave?
      • How will you feel successful in this role?
      • Is there someone you admire for their activities in your chosen role? What is it about them that you admire?

In the role you chose, there is also likely a corresponding role. For example, if you chose “parent,” the related part would be the child. If you selected “spouse/partner,” it would be your spouse/partner. Now answer the following questions:

      • What are your expectations of them?
      • What would make them excellent in that role?
      • How do you want to describe them in that role?
      • Who do you know that you admire in this role, and why?

As you look at the answers to all these questions, what are the recurring themes or ideas? The words you see coming from these answers are no doubt what you value the most.

Now download the list of 100 virtues or go to our “100 Virtues” page at josephmichael.coach. As you look at these virtues, which ones match what you have identified as being your best self?

Some virtues may not have yet developed the way you would like. Or you may notice some that you identify with closely and are pleased with how you show them. But, on the other hand, other virtues may appear overdeveloped—as in, maybe you should balance them with another virtue.

What is the value of this exercise? When you identify what you value the most—the virtues you respect for yourself and others—you can begin to determine what that looks like in your day-to-day life. It helps us make choices about everything by comparing those choices with who we aspire to be.

I invite you to sign up for our newsletter. It is a great way to get the Virtue of the Month and tips on relationships, parenting, and self-care. In addition, you’ll be the first to know about upcoming classes for successful families.

To sign up, visit the “Newsletter” section here on the website. Enter your email address, and you’ll receive our newsletter in your inbox on Wednesdays.  I appreciate your interest in bringing out the best in your children and yourself. We look forward to keeping you informed through our newsletter!

Unwind and Bond: Fun Ways for the Entire Family to Relax Together!

Unwind and Bond: Fun Ways for the Entire Family to Relax Together!

by | Apr 21, 2023 | Parenting, Relationships, Self-care, Uncategorized

6 Ways to Unwind and Bond as a Family!

We all experience moments of stress, and families are no exception. It can become especially intense when it feels like there’s no break from running errands, going to school, working, and other obligations.

The key to handling this is to make sure to take some time to relax. Unwinding isn’t just about taking a break.

Unwinding as a family can strengthen their connections by engaging in shared experiences, communicating openly, creating positive memories, building trust, problem-solving, and creating a sense of togetherness that will last a lifetime. This blog post will discuss some quick ways families can unwind together, create lasting memories, and strengthen relationships.

Tell a Story

Choose a theme that ties all the stories together. It could be something like “family vacations,” “holiday traditions,” or “funny family moments.” Having a theme will keep the stories focused and make it easier to remember them. Use old photographs or videos for jogging the memory. Get everyone involved by encouraging everyone to describe how they remember the event. Events that are fun or funny are especially bonding. This is a fun and interactive way to learn about each other’s past experiences and pass on family traditions and history.

Watch a Movie

Speaking of laughter, this would be the perfect time for a comedy—funny movies help keep the mood light. Also, laughter has been proven through various studies to lower blood pressure while at the same time stimulating endorphins in the brain, which help us relax and feel good in the moment.

Have a Hot Beverage

What about some tea or hot chocolate? Warm beverages naturally require time to drink them, which gives everyone a breather. The warmth also reduces cortisol, a hormone associated with stress (why bubble baths can be so relaxing).

Take a Walk

Exercise has so many health benefits that it should almost go without saying. The best part about walking together is that it gives time for conversation without leaving anyone out. You can use a stroller for the youngest family members. For bonus points, look for a way to walk somewhere you can appreciate nature, such as in a park or a forest. Did you know being around plants of any variety can lower stress levels?

Have a Snack

While grabbing food when stressed isn’t a great habit, a little treat can improve the mood. Having a supply of snack-size sweets allows you to enjoy them without going overboard. Watch your kids’ eyes light up when offered an unexpected sweet.

Remember the Day

If you want to unwind at the end of the day, add this game to your bedtime routine. Go around the room and ask everyone to talk about something they enjoyed or were grateful for about the day.

Practice unwinding as a family regularly, which will give everyone something to look forward to during the week when things are stressful. Here are a few examples of family night activities:

    • Movie nights
    • Game nights
    • Regular outdoor activities like biking, hiking, picnic, rock climbing, or kayaking (non-structured and the whole family can participate in)
    • Cooking together
    • Arts & Crafts
    • Reading
    • Volunteering
    • Family dinners (best when done often)

You can use any of these activities as a stage for unwinding and weekly family meetings where you can engage in activities together and have the chance to talk, listen, and share thoughts and feelings. This communication helps family members better understand each other and build stronger connections.

I invite you to sign up for our newsletter. It is a great way to get the Virtue of the Month and tips on relationships, parenting, and self-care. In addition, you’ll be the first to know about upcoming classes for successful families.

To sign up, visit the “Newsletter” section here on the website. Enter your email address, and you’ll receive our newsletter in your inbox on Wednesdays.  I appreciate your interest in bringing out the best in your children and yourself. We look forward to keeping you informed through our newsletter!

Why Unwinding Is Essential for Both You and Your Children

Why Unwinding Is Essential for Both You and Your Children

by | Apr 17, 2023 | Parenting, Self-care

Overcome Common Barriers and Relax

We all know that unwinding is good for us. After all, think how wonderful it feels to relax after a long, difficult day! There’s no better way to shed stress or ease worry. Unfortunately, though, sometimes unwinding is easier said than done. 

If you’re having difficulty unwinding, it’s time for intentionality in your subsequent actions. First, look at some barriers to letting go and what you can do about them.

If you’re having difficulty unwinding, it’s time for intentionality in your subsequent actions. First, look at some barriers to letting go and what you can do about them.

Current Events Have You Down

The problem with being plugged in every second of the day is we become very aware of what’s happening in the world. It can lead to many worries and stress about things happening worldwide, and it seems impossible to relax at the end of the day. The fix? Limit your media exposure. For example, make a point not to watch the news before bed or allow yourself only a certain amount of time to follow the news every day.

You Feel Like There’s Too Much to Do

The problem with being busy is that it’s always possible to get busier. While this can be great news for your business, it can wreak havoc on your ability to end the day and unwind. The fix? Create a schedule where you quit all extra activities for the day at a specific time. Then, if anything is unfinished, jot it down on tomorrow’s to-do list and let it go so you can unwind properly.

You Don’t Have Time to Unwind

This can be difficult, especially if you’re used to scheduling your day to be busy. The problem? You’re leading yourself straight to burnout. The fix? It’s pretty simple. Start planning time to unwind every day. Be strict with yourself about using it.

You Don’t Think You Deserve Time Off

Unfortunately, we were taught to be productive every minute of the day since we were children. It leads to many complicated feelings about taking time off, even to unwind at the end of the day. The fix? A reality check can do wonders here. Unwinding is a crucial part of being productive. Without rest, you can’t possibly do more later. Want to go even better? Spend time rewiring your brain to accept one straightforward truth: YOU DESERVE TIME TO YOURSELF. We all do—end of story. 

All of these can be barriers for our children, too. For example, if your child’s usual way of being is interrupted, and you see changes in sleep, eating, or resting patterns, it could be that the local or world news worries them. They may need to talk and tell you how they are feeling. You may need to reassure them that you are there to keep them safe. 

In today’s world, children’s schedules are packed so tight with things that we have been told are necessary to succeed. Children need time to unwind and be children. However, scheduling them with back-to-back activities or activities every evening after school is too much for many, if not all, children. 

They deserve time off. They need time to unwind; they need time with you and your family; and, most importantly, they need you and family time. Even more importantly, they need you to set an example for them of what it means to be balanced in life.

Clarity about what is important to you and your family will help you choose how to spend your time. Don’t be influenced by what others tell you your child “should” do. Instead, relax, be your best self, and practice what you know is best for you and your family.

I invite you to sign up for our newsletter. It is a great way to get the Virtue of the Month and tips on relationships, parenting, and self-care. In addition, you’ll be the first to know about upcoming classes for successful families.

To sign up, visit the “Newsletter” section here on the website. Enter your email address, and you’ll receive our newsletter in your inbox on Wednesdays.  I appreciate your interest in bringing out the best in your children and yourself. We look forward to keeping you informed through our newsletter!